It looks like my attempts to do the NaBloPoMo thing – writing a blog post for every day of the month – failed. After all, I’ve not so much as touched the “Publish” button for three whole days.
Fortunately, the mob of angry citizens heading for my door with torches in hands appears to have not yet arrived. They must have got held up. I feel I should take advantage of the delay, then, by breaking the fast. Maybe I can redeem myself to the disgusted masses, and persuade them to put away their placards and not force me to engage in some sock-eating torture.
It’s a shame that I failed. It happened because I got distracted by other things. But hey, I’m still on the path to 28 articles this month, which is what would have have happened if I’d chosen to do this thing in February. Onwards and upwards, as an ongoing and upfacing person will attest.
For those moments when you are craving the joy which my blog brings, I suggest you tumble over to my sensational new “tumblelog”, entitled “Hairy Egg”. It’s where I post the few things which I occasionally like on the internet. Everything that doesn’t make my blood boil and my mouth resemble a soap factory explosion, then. Like Twitter, it’s what boring people call “microblogging”, which sounds suspiciously like some kind of invisible-to-the-human-eye micro-orgasm that causes vomiting. (If you read on, I’ll mention Twitter again with a link and everything – I don’t want to link to my profile too gratuitously, because that would make it just too obvious that I am, like, blatantly self-promoting, yeah?)
Hairy Egg is a snazzy new name thing of mine – some call them “handles”, although I deem that name to be inappropriate since a handle can be used for door-opening and lifting, which the name “Hairy Egg” cannot. It’s part of my “personal branding”, if you will – although you probably won’t, because anyone who uses that wretched term is almost certainly an utter bore who has ears moulded to the shape of their “SmartPhone”, and who when on holiday shuffles uncomfortably whilst wearing such “casual wear” as a suit with the tie removed. Hairy Egg is also my new Twitter username. Maybe this blog will be named Hairy Egg when this web hosting runs out – I plan to ditch joshuagoodwin.com when that happens far into the future, although unfortunately some queef has already nabbed the .com domain name. And the .co.uk one. There is a .gg ending thing, which would be groovy, but they are expensive on an eye watering scale.
Tomorrow, an article stuffed with pictures. When I say “stuffed”, I mean, like a mushroom, yeah? Whether or not when I say “like a mushroom” I mean like, y’know, life’s too short and all that jazz, remains to be seen.